shiver me timbers

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

31 December 2013 - Beneath my fur coat I am a Florida cat.  My idea of perfection is lying in a square of sunlight on a hot day.  So the winter season is a time that I fervently wish to pass quickly.  Frozen water hanging from branches and roof edges holds no fascination until it begins to drip, and going out in the snow....well, let's just say that I wouldn't, and no way would I be seen in public in a dim deep sweater.  A warmed towel or a peep lap help me stave off pneumonia.  And to think that my personal misery is all due to our leaning away from the sun!  Can't we all agree to lean in instead?  I realize that it would be simpler to relocate our domicile farther south, to escape these cold temperatures, but my peeps aren't as fond of tropical air as am I.  So here I sit in compromise, chilly feet and warm heart.

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Life began earlier, but living

started when fire was tamed.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

word of the day - purrspire, glow with warmth, radiate purrsonal heat

be azured

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

30 December 2013 - I suspect that I am not the only one who feels a tad blue right now.  After all the excitement and anticipation, the other side of holidays can be a real downer.  Not only must we deal with disappointment and ennui, but even the "big" questions rise up, in the dark hours of the night, to plague our thoughts:  does my life have meaning?  am I living up to my potential?  will I be missed?  Of course there is no answer that will lay these to rest forever, as doubt is always lurking in the mind's shadowy corners.  I have found that staying busy or staying asleep will get me through these funks.  Perhaps that is why we make such a hoopla over the arrival of a new year:  a fresh landscape with hope all the way to the horizon.

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Some days just have to be endured.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

word of the day - downcat, having a curl-up-in-a-ball, don't-bother-me day

making the spirit bright

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

29 December 2013 - Something tells me that the number of remaining under-the-tree opportunities can be counted on one paw.  Scarcity tends to trigger hoarding, so I have been taking naps and baths beneath the ornaments.  It is a mesmerizing place, a controlled bit of wildness in which even the most timid can relax.  I have noticed that the things spread around the tree's base are slowly disappearing, being absorbed into the household.  If memory is accurate, soon the container boxes will be pulled out from hiding, and the holiday scene will be dismantled and packed away for another time.  I can't fathom what dire consequences would be triggered if the peeps simply neglected to do so.  True, housecleaning (in which I take no part but have "noticed") is more tedious with all the extra stuff occupying horizontal surfaces; also true and more regrettable, the eye would quickly fatigue and cease to be enchanted.  So, yes, when put that way, I guess that every special moment must have a lifespan.

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Ends follow beginnings.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

word of the day - magicat, possessing qualities naturally found in a feline; astonishing, breathtaking, mind-blowing

do you hear what I hear?

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

29 December 2013 - Ever since that sneak attack by the Big Guy, I have been a bit jumpy.  The peeps drop something on the floor, and my pulse races.  A shadow crosses my body, and I am startled from sleep.  The doorbell rings, and I flee the scene.  I'm hoping that this bad case of nerves will dissipate with time, but meanwhile my life is punctuated by anxiety.  Unfortunately I am unaffected by the soothing effects of catnip, a known recreational substance for at least 50% of my kind.  I could really benefit from some in-the-now drooling and purring.

 

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Chill out.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

word of the day - catawampus, an imaginary creature that instills fear

it happenstanced one night

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

27 December 2013 - I have great fun messing with the mind of the shorter peep.  She is honing a theory that her suggestion transmorphs, after three minutes, into my idea.  This bit of baloney evidently is founded on her observation that suggestions put to me don't get an immediate response, but that "after a while" I do that very thing.  For example, "do you want to get in the box?" is offered after I vocalize "I require attention."  She then points in that direction, as if I am deaf, and waits for me to move.  And I wait for her to scratch my head...which isn't forthcoming.  So the stand-off ends "after a while" when I conclude that the box might be a comforting place to sulk.

 

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Two simultaneous events do not

have to be connected by dots.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

phrase of the day - cat chance, the likelihood that what you want and what the feline wants are the same

peeuw-gilist

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

26 December 2013 - The shorter peep seemed intent that I should get into the spirit of Boxing Day, so I complied as much as my catness would tolerate.  Also in the picture is my new toy (no, not the socks), a gift from recent visitors.  I would be much more gregarious if everyone came bearing boxes for me.  There has been much foot traffic through the homestead lately, and only a few of them wished me well.  Isn't this supposed to be the season of good will?  I know, I know, "good will toward men" but aren't we bigger than semantics?

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Don't put people into boxes.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

phrase of the day - cat-bored box, the stereotype of a world-weary "oh, please, spare me" feline

don't grinch

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

25 December 2013 - Of course it would happen this way:  I doze off for maybe an hour (watching/waiting is a tiring job), and the Big Guy slips in and just as quietly slips out.  I didn't even get to sidle up to his girth, and leave some hair on his pants leg.  An opportunity that comes only once a year, and I blew it!  But as you can see, things are quite satisfactory here at the homestead.  I just love tissue-lined boxes, and the miraculous part is that I didn't tell a soul that that was what I wanted for Christmas.

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

 Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Remember to say "thank you".

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

phrase of the day - sandy claws, a cat enjoying the holidays at the beach

no comet

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

24 December 2013 - I don't know if I will survive the day.  My patience is not infinite.  Postponed gratification had to have been invented by sadists.  I began the Santa watch  this morning just to have something to occupy the time.  The peeps are no entertainment at all, as they are preoccupied with their own last-minute things...which are completely boring to watch after five minutes, trust me on this as I sorely tried to muster interest.   A task is made lighter with many hands, so should you spot the Big Guy, would you please ESP me?  Meanwhile join me while I hum Simon's chorus:  

"Anticipation, anticipation

Is makin' me late
Is keepin' me waitin'"

It's going to be a LONG day.

 

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Waiting builds character

of the ornery sort.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

word of the day - cacciatore, (CATch-a-Tory) the Italian word for "hunter"

formerly known as prance

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

22 December 2013 - I will begin with a disclosure that I am, in one measurement, one-fourth Canadian.  However I don't pretend to understand why the peeps have a red-scarfed moose hanging out in the office.  It bears only a superficial resemblance to Bullwinkle, and certainly is not as articulate.  Several summers ago the peeps went in search of a moose, wandering north of the 49th parallel.  They carried with them almost-certain assurances that an Alces alces would be spotted.  And they returned from their trek with hopes frayed.  Is this stuffed ersatz satisfying the quest?  Is it possibly an inside joke?  If I wish to remain sane, I must release the why, for some questions receive no answer.

 

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

"Why" is a trouble-maker.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

quote of the day - " I always thought two rights made a U-turn."

ho-ho-ho...you must be kidding

Me-ow-my-oh!

 

Me-usings and Me-emories

21 December 2013 - You peeps can only hope to own it like a cat.  When observed tripping on a step, my entire body registers, "I intended to do that."  When surprised on the kitchen counter, my innocence responds, "who, me?"  When discovered scrutinizng a bottom-most ornament, I nonchalantly inspect the railing for a suspected chameleon.  My species does not do guilt; consequently we can not feel remorse.  Things are, and if you believe that I am spastic or disobedient or mischievous, then you are the one with the problem.  I am, lest you forget, the descendant of Bastet.

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

 Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Stoke that inner spark of godness.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

film of the day - Inside Llewyn Davis, the latest Coen movie and starring an orange tabby

all tied up

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

20 December 2013 - It appears that I got a bit too involved in my work, but the holidays are known for excess.  And the frazzled peeps did smile when they saw me thus entangled, so it was all good.  Green seems to be a favored December color, perhaps because in the northern climes there is little of it to be seen, but I honestly think that I was made for red.  Don't take this statement as indication that I am ready to wear one of those ridiculous Santa hats (no offense, Big Guy, keep your jolly) or sport a metrosexual bow tie...yes, I can read the thoughts of the shorter peep.  I mean, really, if you wanted a dress-up doll you should have come home with a dim deep.

 

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

It's easy to accessorize,

and that includes the jacket

as well as the truth.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

 

phrase of the day - a feather in one's cat, oh dear, better check the bird cage

nice work

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

19 December 2013 - I realize that there are examples of my species that seem to delight in scaling indoor trees and peeking out among the ornaments.  But truly they are devil-may-care rogues, and I really don't have much in common with their antics.  Even as a wee kit I was quite dignified...there probably is a correlation between spiffy dress and refined behavior.  I am quite happy to be a part of the scene without taking the scene apart.  The peeps have finally stopped fussing with house decorations, so now there is little to do but wait...and stay off the naughty list.

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Being nice can be a pain.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

phrase of the day - fat cat, a well-fed feline that knows how to throw his weight around

wrapped around the little finger

Me-ow-my-oh!

Me-usings and Me-emories

18 December 2013 - Finally there is some activity beneath the tree, and I am supervising the process, gratis, to insure a quality job.  Even though this particular package isn't, alas, to or from me, I feel the flagging peep can benefit from my encouraging presence.  She is, I can attest, sleeping the sleep of the exhausted, but even so I can detect the scent of fatigue on her skin.  I have tried, by example, to suggest a beneficial nap, but she isn't picking up on the hints.  You can understand my concern, as much remains to be done.  For one thing, her shopping isn't completed based on the absence of any gift addressed to me.  I have been exceptionally well-behaved and ever attentive, so I feel confident that my wishes will be granted...well, perhaps everything but the white meek meep, but I can manage without that one as there are numerous brown specimens just outside the door.

methodology of the meow-stro

 

 

 

Today's Catechism 

(for the self-taught)

Extend a hand; you might

need one in the future.

Bring back Bastet

Bastet beckons

Catty Corner

word of the day - cattered, torn and otherwise in poor condition from being shredded by claws